They were speaking to VMware CEO Paul Maritz who says, among other things,  that one of the biggest challenges leaders face is being self aware and that it really takes some effort.

Self awareness is a little-understood  tenet of emotional intelligence and very few people, and even fewer CEO’s,  have it.

It requires that you understand your own strengths and weaknesses, something that most people are oblivious to. That’s the reason that, in any group I’ve ever surveyed when I ask how many think they are above average everyone raises a hand. I guess all the average people go to other seminars.

Most of us are painfully unaware of our real weaknesses and only have a vague idea of what we are good at. This allows employees to blame someone else for their problems. I’m not saying that corporations and small businesses do not sometimes make irrational decisions, but you have to acknowledge that, viewed objectively, employees often play a role in what happens to them. Corporate layoffs dictated by budget cuts may be an exception, sometimes, but not always.

By the time anyone gets to be a CEO they become convinced that if they were not good at everything they would not have made it to the top.

The truth is, they made it through a confluence of events, which in many cases includes luck as well as talent. Executives who have problems can easily blame everyone else.

Coaching forums are filled with tales of CEO’s who may be good at some things but don’t recognize their failings, and worse yet, do not have Mr. Moritz’s ability to hire people who make up for what they lack.

I applaud his candor and while I wish others understood what he is saying, executive coaches would be out of a job if they did.

I don’t know if Mr. Moritz has worked with a coach or not, but if he did, that coach can be proud of his or her work. If not, then I just applaud the CEO’s intelligence and can understand why his company is successful.

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Since MP3 players, primarily iPods and their kin, became popular there seem to be a lot more folks walking around listening to music. I have no objection to music  but it seems to me. if you’re hiking, or even jogging in a beautiful natural setting, listening to the birds would be pretty good music.

Not to mention how those little earbuds close you off to the world. They prevent even a pleasant ‘hello’ or ‘good morning.’ Maybe that’s the intention but chance encounters make life more interesting.

This week I finally found someone who agrees with me. Please listen, he knows what he’s talking about. He must, he’s speaking at a TED Talk.

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I was having lunch at a small SoHo restaurant where the tables are so close you can’t help but hear the discussion next to you. I listened for almost 20 minutes while 4, 30-something managers talked about marketing, social networking demographics, and user information to keep in touch with young customers and create an online community. I knew the terms but this was the first time I heard them used in polite conversation.

This was my first clue that there was a generation gap between our tables.

Finally I couldn’t help it, I excused myself for listening but asked if the group was at all concerned about privacy, noting the recent Verizon television ad which shows everyday objects morphing into antennas for the ‘always connected’ generation. I told them I found it creepy and didn’t ever want to be that ‘in touch.’

Their unanimous response – privacy is always part of the conversation but the younger generation thinks always being connected is the way things should be. They want everyone to know where they are and what they are doing all the  time. As one young woman said, “our generation doesn’t want that, but the young people do.”

I thought I was talking to young people, but they were describing their generation gap.

I was worrying about George Orwell’s predictions and they were worried their company would be left behind because it wasn’t Orwellian enough.

I’m not sure what all this means. I thought i was pretty up to date with my Twitter  account (eariess), blog, LinkedIn page, and text messaging but I guess the faster I go the further behind I get.

I do take some solace from the text messages I get from my 90-year-old father. I hope if I make it to his age I’ll at least be  in touch with whatever the current generation is doing.

In case you’re wondering what I’m talking about you can find details at this Wall Street Journal Article.

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Like a lot of companies Google requires a non-disclosure agreement, so I can’t go into a long post about everything I saw, but I have to say it is a very unique place. You can’t help be impressed with the atmosphere.

And yes, lunch was free. I couldn’t help but wonder if it would be a good place for experiments in whether people really do it more just because it’s available. I didn’t notice too many overweight employees. Must be the volleyball court, soccer filed , endless pools or workout rooms. Or possibly the Google bikes people use to ride between buildings.

After all, the Google campus is bigger than my college campus at least when I attended school.

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Little things I’m used to doing, such as thumbing ahead to see how many pages are left in the chapter, are more difficult.

Highlighting text is easier, once you understand what the device or application wants. Reviewing all the highlighted material, to help write a review or for research, is certainly much easier.

I was worried that my eyes would get tired quicker but that proved not to be the case. Downloading the books has been easy although, not every service has every book, so it sometimes takes a bit of searching. Browsing the online bookstores is certainly not as pleasurable as strolling through my local bookshop. You have to know what you want electronically speaking, before you go start.

Using the iPad was easy enough although it can’t be used in every situation and I doubt I would take it to the beach. But I was able to take several books on a recent trip with little or no extra weight.

It will be a while before electronic books replace the printed word. There is still something more satisfying about holding a book in your hand, but I have already downloaded a few more and I’m sure, in time,  iPad reading will become my regular habit.

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The New York Times  had a recent front page story claiming that even the hi-tech industry wasn’t hiring.

Maybe it’s my own version of cognitive dissonance – refusing to believe facts counter to you own beliefs – but I hear  a different theme.

Every major firm in Silicon Valley has openings. Google’s stock has recently taken a hit, in part because they have added more people – too many according analysts. Yahoo, Intel, Apple and others are all looking for talented employees.

The problem seems to be they can’t find enough with the right skills so they are all trying to hiring the same folks. That’s not an employment problem it’s a skills/training issue.

I know a man who was unemployed in Silicon Valley for 18 months and recently found a job and has since had two other opportunities. That’s a far cry from what he’s been through.

Or take my friends in Hawaii, who don’t claim the economy has recovered, but say, it’s certainly better than last year.

Or take the woman in Boston who I ran into. She just started working after a 9-month forced vacation. She says the hotel in Cambridge that hired her has been booked solid since she started working in April.

Or take the man in New York who I met, who works three part time jobs and just lost one of them when a financial services firm closed. He’s able to collect unemployment so he’s counted in statistics but he’s not exactly desperate.

My unscientific survey of  ‘Help Wanted’ signs in store windows shows a marked increase over last year. I’ve seen them in New York City, Boston, and San Francisco.

I’m not sure what all this proves except that, as I tell my clients, if you believe things are bad that will come through in your interviews and enthusiasm. But if you believe things are headed in the right direction despite the political rhetoric, you’ll have a much easier time finding something.

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But, like everything else, there’s a lesson here.

To get the new photo I went to a local photographer. I just needed an image for the page but I never thought to ask about whether the photographer, Nan Phelps in Kensington, CA, used a digital camera.

She doesn’t . Nan uses a Mamiya C330 – a model I used as a photographer 30 years ago. What ensued was a lengthy conversation about whether she should switch, or at least offer customers a digital option.

“Photography is about the process,” she said, “I see it as art, and when I hear about other photographers spending hours digitally retouching photographs I cringe. I don’t mind being called weird, or old fashioned, I have a niche, I’m doing very well, and I meet many starving digital photographers, all stressing the need for a faster and faster turnaround. I just want to say stop.”

She was unmoved by my suggestions,  insisting she didn’t care if the digital shutterbugs  raced to the bottom offering lower prices.

“I don’t need to update my software or computer every 18 months, and I’m very proud of my work and don’t have to worry about whether an image I took with a digital camera might be one I want to enlarge but can’t.

It was a wonderful discussion and I have to admit she may have won me over. You can decide for yourself when the new portrait is posted, but just maybe, we’d all be a bit better off if we just slowed down.

I know there would be less stress and that could only be good. Thanks Nan.

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How much nicer would it be if my nightstand was clear except for a new new iPad which had all the books and the newspaper in one place. I know the Kindle could do the same thing but without the color and graphics. Watch for me in line when they go on sale next month.

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